Damn Kids

My neighbor kids used to play this game....
They would knock on our door and run. Hilarious.
(actually, it was pretty funny.. Jerk Face looked like the classic 'grumpy old man' at he door looking for those whippersnappers..)
Last fall, this happened quite often.... until, Jerk Face caught one! (he was so proud of himself!)

All day long, 3 boys would 'hide' behind trees... Think cartoon style... Skinny trees, only they didn't disappear behind them (I never realized just HOW stupid kids were until this happened! HA!)
They would ring the doorbell, and run... and keeping in good 'grumpy old man' character, Jerk Face would go open the door, stand there and look around.... all the while the boys having a good laugh...
Then they KEPT doing it... LB was only a few month's old.. it started to get a bit annoying.
Then it happened: Jerk Face kept the front door opened just a crack... He spotted the little rascal coming up our driveway... Looking towards his friends as in: Yeah, I got this! 
He crept closer and closer... finally reaching the door...
Jerk Face opened the door: "Can I help you?"
Kid: (all flustered) "No, I was just coming over to apologize... My friend over there was just trying to have some fun..."
Jerk Face: "It's okay. Don't worry about it."

..And they stopped...

Until last Friday night.   Just after I put LB down for the night, came downstairs to unwind for the day, when.....  DINGDONG!
Jerk Face and I look at eachother... What the heck? It's nearly 9:30...
Jerk Face opens the door...  Nobody.
oh great!
I really don't mind them having fun and being pranksters, but when it comes to my LB's sleep... ain't nobody gonna be messin' wit dat  (that was my 'hood' speak)
So, I left a note on our door:

I decided to keep it polite, because I didn't need eggs on my door... Besides, I'm pretty sure Jerk Face and I are the neighborhood weirdos and didn't need them telling their parents about some nasty note we left on the door...and they come over to give us crap... Nevermind that your kid is over here disturbing the peace! 

... 

*If you don't know who the weirdo is, it's probably you!*

This and That and LB

Just to clarify...

Jerk Face also told me that it sounds like my neighbor boy really went to the bar and told people about our bedtime dance in this post... So, I thought I would clear it up and tell you that sometimes I make things up in my head... This was just an imaginary rant... I'm sure he's an upstanding young man... and I don't think any negative thoughts about him because he still lives with his parents.

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I know you are DYING TO KNOW whether or not the Gerber Good Start was stinky or not...

Well, Gerber Good Start was the least offensive to the olfactory senses... however, LB's tummy didn't care for it much... :(  Boo!  So, we've decided to switch back to Enfasmell ... the lesser of two evils....
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LB's 1st birthday is only 2 1/2 months away. Can you believe it?! Just a few days ago Jerk Face was driving us home from the hospital ...going about 15 mph!! :)  ..And now she's almost a year!
We had her 9 month well check last Monday. She's 28 inches and 19.4 lbs...
She can play pat-a-cake, wave good bye, and she'll try to pull herself up on anything she can! She can't crawl forward, but she's the best reverse scooter in town! She says 'Uh-oh' and 'mama' (she says mama usually when she's tired or mad... *sigh*) She has 4 teeth (her 2 bottoms, left vampire, and just got her top front on the left). She likes to blow and she likes to 'eat' the wind. She LOVES to click her tongue, dance, 'gurgle' and grab anything and everything within her reach!
For her birthday, I had asked whether you like owls or birds better... You guys chose owls, but Jerk Face likes the birds (because we call LB 'Tweets')... So! I'm going to try to incorporate them both :)   ...we'll see how that works out...

Happy Saturday Everyone!

It's Time For Bed

Let me tell you about LB's bedtime routine...

it starts downstairs, as Jerk Face holds LB, I am the Master of Ceremonies... and start the routine...
"ATTENnnnTION!" (pause for effect)  "Forward ... MARCH!"
LB gets SO excited!
and then I begin my song:
'The Ants Go Marching One by One; Hurrah! Hurrah!...' LB can't contain herself! She is bouncing in Dad's arms, laughing! She LOVES it!
We make our way up the stairs and through the hall (stopping at 3.. to 'hug LB') and when we get to 4 we 'walk through the door' and into LB's room... where we finish the song...... I do a variety of dance moves (all the while exuberantly marching ... 5-take a dive, 6- pick up sticks, 7-gaze at Heaven, 8-close the gate, at 9.. I 'get in line' behind Jerk Face and LB and we march around her room...  Then we get to 10... and this is my big finale... I'm waving my arms and using exaggerated movements... as it is the end... 'boom boom boom boom Boom boom boom boom B Ooo ooo oo o mmmm!'  LB always smiles at the end Boom! Because she is so totally over the song by then and knows it's finally over!! I always have fun :)


Soo... Did I mention that we have yet to put up curtains in LB's room?
Yep! She's been a real human for 9 months now, and we still don't have any kind of window treatment up...
I'm okay with it.
well....
until I looked out the window one night while doing my ...very artisic surely worthy of being on So You Think You Can Dance? ... dance, and low and behold... sitting on the porch across the street, looking in the window... watching this sacred family ritual... is the neighbor boy! He's not really a boy, since he's probably in his early 20's.. and I'm sure he's at the local pub, the one Jerk Face and I used to frequent, talking to all the flies we used to talk to and telling them about these crazy people that he watches... He probably invites them over so they can witness it for themselves... Dude! I HAVE to check it out! It's just too funny to be true!
Oh! The embarrassment!
Perhaps when he tells his parents... !Yeah! You still live with your parents! Stop making fun of me, punk! ... they'll just say: 'oh! Those weirdos must be good parents!'  Because EVERYbody knows that in order to be a good parent you need to make an ass out of yourself multiple times a week... heck! even multiple times a day!!!

...Maybe I'll just forget the curtains and start charging....